Praying for the Reality We Seek

What follows is the sermon I planned on delivering at Yom Kippur evening services.

When Jordan’s King Hussein traveled to Israel for the first time soon after the signing the peace accords between Israel and Jordan, many Jews ventured to the airport to recite a blessing. They came to say a blessing that few Jews ever have the opportunity to recite. It is the blessing for a king, prescribed by our tradition millennia ago. It reads: “Baruch Ata Adonai, Eloheinu melech ha-olam, sh-natan m’kvodo l’vasar va-dam. Blessed are You Adonai our God ruler of the universe, who gives some of God’s glory to flesh and blood.”

Although this story is admittedly a legend and I could uncover no proof of its veracity, it does illustrate an important Jewish principle and one about which I would like to ponder this evening. And that is the meaning of our prayers for our country and for Israel. Why does our tradition mandate a blessing for the government and in this case for a king? Perhaps it is to remind us that true glory only comes from God and that everyone needs to say out loud that there is only one true Sovereign. Then again perhaps it is because by saying a blessing we strengthen our souls. Even though the king might not be such a good ruler, or might even oppress us, our souls can resist oppression if we fill them with blessings of gratitude.

This has been the Jewish response to the world for thousands of years. Let’s shout a blessing to the world even though Tevye has been right for so much much of our history. In that famous line from Fiddler, he remarks, (say it with me) “May God bless and keep the Czar… far away from us.” On this Yom Kippur evening I would like to meditate on the meaning of our prayers for our country and the prayer for Israel.

In our own day and age our relationship to the government and its rulers has changed. Here in this country, we enjoy unprecedented freedoms. The Jewish community has flourished in America in large part because of the separation of church and state. Religious creativity has benefited from our constitution’s first amendment and the guarantees it affords. Many people become weary when religion becomes too much a part of the public square. We worry that public religious expressions will become exclusively that of the majority religion. And so, we fight to keep religion and state separate. Religion in here—in the synagogue. The state out there—in the public square. Still most feel little or no conflict offering a prayer for our country. Even though in any given year, half of us did not vote for the president, we persist in offering this prayer. We understand the meaning of the prayer for our country to be about asking God’s blessings for all and that the current government might rule wisely and fairly.

Most synagogues, such as ours, proudly display an American flag on the bima. But this was not always the case. This practice began after World War I when a wave of patriotism swept the nation. Likewise, the Israeli flag became prominent in American synagogues after Israel’s Six Day War victory when the American Jewish community was swept up in the euphoria that followed the overwhelming worry preceding that war. Today, I wonder what the future will hold given that flying the American flag has become increasingly associated with one party over another or that in many circles there is growing ambivalence about our relationship with Israel and its current government. But our prayers have never reflected our politics or our relationship with the state.

For millennia we have offered a prayer for the government. No matter where we have found ourselves, whether we enjoyed the blessings of American democracy or as in Tevye’s case were oppressed by the czar, we prayed for our country.

What is most fascinating is that this prayer’s origins date back to times when Jewish life was not flourishing, when we could not even trust the government and the state even caused us great harm. Take the first example of this prayer in our tradition. After the first Temple was destroyed and the Jewish people were exiled to Babylonia in the sixth century BCE, the prophet Jeremiah advises, “And seek the welfare of the city to which I have exiled you and pray to God in its behalf; for in its prosperity you shall prosper. Dirshu et hashalom ha-ir.” (Jeremiah 29:7) Pray for the peace of the city.

What is our first impulse after finding ourselves outside of the land of Israel. Let’s pray for where we find ourselves even if it is in the very place that is the very home of the guys who brought all this destruction upon us. Wow. You would think the prophet would advise us to throw curses at the Babylonians not blessings. The Jewish impulse is that no matter what our circumstances we pray. Even if we should not be grateful, we fill our souls with thanks. It is to stave off the oppression of the soul.

The rabbis adopt Jeremiah’s philosophy when they advised that we should pray for the Roman government who destroyed the second temple, although they added an interesting, and perhaps prophetic, caveat. The rabbis advised, “The government appears friendly when it is their own interests but does not stand by you when it is your hour of need.” (Pirke Avot 2:3) Still, the rabbinic impulse is cursing never serves our spiritual interests. Only shouting blessings serves the soul’s hunger. Cursing denigrates the soul. Blessings uplift it.

By the time, we arrive to the medieval period, and most likely in the years preceding our expulsion from Spain—again the list of bad stuff is quite long, we find the form of the prayer that we still recite today. I do not wish to offer a history lesson about the nuances of this prayer for our country, but it is important that we have been praying for the government regardless of whether we liked it or not, loved it or not, or in our own age, voted for it or not. Most importantly, we have prayed for the government whether it was good to us or not and even really, really bad to us.

Shout blessings to the world has been our motto from our earliest days and also from our earliest pains. And so, every Friday night, we say, “May we never be lazy in the work of peace; may we honor those who have died in defense of our ideals. Grant our leaders wisdom and forebearance. May they govern with justice and compassion. Help us all to appreciate one another, and to respect the many ways that we may serve You.” Those are the words of our prayerbook’s prayer for our country. The prayer’s dreams have not been realized, but we offer them nonetheless. Does reciting the prayer help to bring its ideals to fruition? I would like to think so. Does saying it week in and week out remind us about our nation’s highest aspirations? I really, really hope so.

And this brings me to the second prayer about which I would like to dwell. The prayer for the State of Israel, called in Hebrew T’filat L’sh’lom medinat Yisrael. The prayer for the peace of the State of Israel. Obviously, this prayer has not been recited for millennia and entered the prayerbook soon after the establishment of the state. In fact, it was authored by the first chief rabbi of the state, Rabbi Yitzhak HaLevi Herzog, the father of Chaim Herzog who served as Israel’s president beginning in the 1980’s and the grandfather of Isaac Herzog, its current president.

The words to this prayer were first published in Haaretz on September 20th, 1948, during a cease fire in the War of Independence. It is almost as if its concluding line is a prayer that the current cease fire might not prove fleeting as history so often suggests. “V’natata shalom baaretz, v’simchat olam l’yoshveha. Establish peace in the land and fullness of joy for all who dwell there.” Its words remind us that peace is not just for the Jews who make this their home but for all. Let every person who lives there feel joy. May the land know peace.

The prayer is recited in every synagogue in Israel. It is said by secular and religious Israelis. It is recited at public events and private affairs. It is not however universally said at all of the world’s synagogues. Many Reform synagogues only offer this prayer on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. I am proud to say that our congregation is apparently unique among Reform synagogues because we recite the prayer for Israel at every Shabbat service. It remains my most fervent prayer that the land of Israel might know peace. That all its inhabitants will dwell there in safety and security. We pray for peace.

The prayer for the State of Israel begins, “Avinu shebashamayim, tzur Yisrael v’go-alo, bareich et medinat Yisrael, reshit tz’michato g’ulateinu.” Its literal meaning is: “Our Father in Heaven, Rock of Israel and Redeemer, bless the state of Israel, the beginning of the flowering of our redemption.” Our prayerbook renders it differently and reads, “O Heavenly One, Protector and Redeemer of Israel, bless the State of Israel which marks the dawning of hope for all who seek peace.” But the Hebrew echoes our tradition’s prayers. There is the resonance of the Avinu Malkeinu prayer from these High Holidays. We can hear the words we chant before the Mi Chamocha, Tzur Yisrael. Please bless the state of Israel. For 2,000 years we longed for our return to this land. May the State of Israel realize our most fervent hopes. May this unparalleled blessing of sovereignty prove to be the beginnings of our redemption.

And yet since October 7th, we seem even farther and farther away from this promised redemption. War, and violence, appear to be an ever-present part of Israel’s, and our people’s, reality. Are our prayers helping to mix religion and politics into some toxic brew? Does this prayer in particular give license to the violent extremists among our people? The traditional version continues beyond our prayerbook’s words and invokes the words of Deuteronomy and says: “And the Lord your God will bring you to the land that your ancestors possessed, and you shall possess it; and God will make you even more prosperous and more numerous than your ancestors.” (Deuteronomy 30:5) I become uncomfortable and ill at ease when we ascribe divine license to our own actions. Violence, and murder, are then sanctified by God. It is not as simple as editing these words out.

I hold on to Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel’s words. He said, “The most basic way in which all people may be divided is between those who believe that war is unnecessary and those who believe that war is inevitable; between those to whom the sword is the symbol of honor and those to whom seeking to convert swords into plowshares is the only way to keep our civilization from disaster.” (“The Moral Outrage of Vietnam,” January 31, 1967) We pray despite our reality. We do not pray to affirm our reality but instead to make our dreams possible. Our prayers do not mirror our lives or even our views. They point heavenward and toward our dreams. We pray for the reality we seek. We pray for the reality God seeks.

Ours is a stubborn faith. Despite historical circumstances, despite the daily cycle of despairing news, despite our precarious situation, despite the world’s tortured history of war, we pray for peace. And so, I focus on our prayerbook’s concluding words, “Establish peace and fullness of joy for all who dwell there.” If we say it enough, and more often enough, maybe we can help to realize its message. That has always been our inclination. Don’t let the world derail your prayers. At least for a brief moment, when we gather, here in this sanctuary, we hold fast and remind ourselves of our noblest of aspirations. We must never allow our dreams for peace to be cast aside.

I think this is why we so love the Hashkiveinu prayer. It embraces our hopes for peace. “Ufros aleinu sukkat shl’lomecha. Spread over us your sukkah—your shelter—of peace.” And it wraps this hope with our most fervent prayer that this peace will come to Israel and in particular our beloved city of Jerusalem, “Haporeis sukkat shalom aleinu v’al kol amo Yisrael v’al Yerushalayim. Blessed are You Adonai, Guardian of Israel whose shelter of peace is spread over us, over all Your people Israel, and over Jerusalem.”

Whenever we think of peace, we think of it beginning in Jerusalem and emanating to the world. In fact, the root of the word for Jerusalem is shalom. It is meant to be the city of peace. I don’t need to point out that present day Jerusalem is a far cry from a city of peace but that’s exactly what makes it a prayer. We have always imagined that one day this city will be filled with peace and to quote the words we recite at every wedding ceremony, “O God, may there always be heard in the cities of Israel and in the streets of Jerusalem: the sounds of joy and of happiness, the voices of grooms and the voices of brides, the shouts of young people celebrating, and the songs of children at play.” As soon as we were expelled from Jerusalem, we started praying not only that we would prosper in the homes we built in other lands but also that our most beloved place will one day know joy and peace. We are stubborn in the face of history. We are defiant against the tides of circumstance.

In 1966 Shai Agnon, the giant of Hebrew literature, was awarded the Nobel Prize in literature. He is the only Israeli author to have ever been awarded this prize. His words constitute a beautiful and exquisitely written speech. He describes his writing as a conduit for the many traditions he inherited, those from the Jewish people, those from all people, and those gleaned from nature. He speaks of his attachment to Jerusalem. And how did Agnon, who also edited the final version of the prayer for the State of Israel, begin his acceptance speech? He began by reciting blessings.

And what blessing did he focus on? It was the blessing for a king. To the Swedish monarch, he pronounced these words, “Baruch Ata Adonai, Eloheinu melech ha-olam, sh-natan m’kvodo l’vasar va-dam. Blessed are You Adonai our God ruler of the universe, who gives some of God’s glory to flesh and blood.” He blessed the king, and I would like to think reminded the king that there really is only one Sovereign. Wow that’s chutzpah. And that’s stubbornness. That’s how we pray. We pray with stubbornness in the face of history and chutzpah in the face of circumstance. And Agnon filled his soul with thanks. His soul soared on the blessings’ wings.

And then the Israeli writer concluded with a prayer. Agnon prayed, “May a redeemer come to Zion, may the earth be filled with knowledge and eternal joy for all who dwell there, and may they enjoy abundant peace. May all this be God’s will. Amen. Kein y’hi ratzon. Amen.”

No matter where we find ourselves, no matter where we stand, we defiantly hold on to peace. This has always been the message of our prayers. This has always been the message of our songs. May we never let go of our dreams for peace—for this nation and for the land of Israel and for the entire world. May we enjoy abundant peace. Kein y’hi ratzon. May all this be God’s will. Amen.

How Can We Do Better?

This coming Wednesday we will gather for Yom Kippur services. We will recite the viddui, the confession of sins. We beat our chests and proclaim, “For the sin we have committed…” and we then intone a litany of wrongs.

Here are a few of the sins listed in our prayerbook:

The ways we have wronged You by hardening our hearts;
and harm we have caused in Your world through careless speech.

The ways we have wronged You by judging others unfairly;
and harm we have caused in Your world through disrespect to parents and teachers.

The ways we have wronged You by violence and abuse;
and harm we have caused in Your dishonesty in business.

Although there are several items on this lengthy list that every single one of us is guilty of doing—there is no one among us who is completely righteous—there are many others that each of us has not committed. This is why we say the viddui in the plural. There is someone who has done the wrong. Someone has transgressed each and every one of these sins and so we embrace each other in order to lift each other up.

Perhaps this past year I managed not to judge someone unfairly, but by proclaiming this sin as a group, others who did so will not feel singled out. If every individual had to declare their individual sins out loud, and say “For the sin I have sinned,” they might be too embarrassed to turn in repentance and correct their failings. The group provides protection and strength.

We say, “For the sin we have committed.” By proclaiming these wrongs together, even those that might not apply, we strengthen each other. We are supported and strengthened by the community. We gain courage to admit our failings by standing with others. This is a central teaching of the Jewish tradition.

We can encourage each other to realize our best version of ourselves.

Then again, maybe the reason why the viddui is said in the plural is to say we want the Jewish people to do better. We so love the Jewish community that we want our family to acknowledge its wrongs and correct its failings. It is not so much about the individuals realizing their potential but the Jewish people striving to do better. And the only way we can acknowledge our collective failings is by acknowledging them together.

On this Yom Kippur, for what must the Jewish people ask forgiveness?

Our Responsibilities to Others

What follows are the Jewish texts we discussed on the second day of Rosh Hashanah as we struggled with the question of what are our responsibilities to others, most especially in the shadow of the war in Gaza.

Leviticus 19:18
Love your neighbor as yourself. I am the Lord.

Exodus 23:9
You shall not oppress a stranger, for you know the feelings of the stranger, having yourselves been strangers in the land of Egypt.

Babylonian Talmud, Bava Metzia 62a
If two people are walking on a desolate path and there was a jug of water in the possession of one of them, and the situation was such that if both drink from the jug, both will die, as there is not enough water, but if only one of them drinks, he will reach a settled area, there is a dispute as to the halakha. Ben Petora taught: It is preferable that both of them drink and die and let neither one of them see the death of the other. This was the accepted opinion until Rabbi Akiva came and taught that the verse states: “And your fellow shall live with you,” (Leviticus 25:36) indicating that your life takes precedence over the life of the other.

Pirke Avot 1:14
Rabbi Hillel used to say: If I am not for myself, who is for me? But if I am for my own self, what am I? And if not now, when?

Midrash Mishlei 25:21
The Talmudic sage Rabbi Hama b. Rabbi Hanina says, “Even though your enemy intended to kill you, if he arrives hungry or thirsty in your house, feed him and give him water. Why? ‘For you will be heaping live coals upon his head, and the Lord will reward (yeshalem) you’ (Proverbs 25:22)—do not read ‘will reward you’ but rather ‘will bring peace between him and you (yashlimenu).’”

Babylonian Talmud, Sanhedrin 72a
If someone comes to kill you, rise up and kill him first.

Iris Eliya Cohen, “Hope”
If there is one righteous person in Gaza
It’s certainly a woman.
A mother or sister
With a beating heart masked in her chest.
And in the midst of all the destruction
Amidst the ruins
And in the captivity of hatred
She gathers a child
Son of the enemy
Softly whispers some words
Gives him a drink of
Milk and a morsel of bread
As if he were her son.

Age Old Answers to Today’s Fears

What follows is my Rosh Hashanah morning sermon. To print a copy and begin reciting my suggested traditional morning prayer Modeh Ani, visit sefaria.org.

These days I am thinking about a young couple. We should remember their names. Shira Milgrim and Yaron Lischinsky. They were gunned down on Washington DC’s streets in May. I could also add Governor Josh Shapiro whose home was firebombed on Passover evening. The list is sadly far too numerous to enumerate. I could speak about Karen Diamond who was killed a few months ago while marching to free the hostages or Saturday evening’s attack at a New Hampshire wedding. Antisemitism and the violence it engender are part of our lives. Such reports have become far too frequent and all too common.

And I am thinking as well about Charlie Kirk’s murder. Political violence is on the rise. We no longer know how to calm our nerves or assuage our country’s ills. We are afraid. We are worried about our nation. We are terrified about our community and where we stand as Jews.

I have been thinking about how best to respond. How can we calm our fears? On this Rosh Hashanah morning, I wish to suggest some responses. I admit these are not original ideas. They are the age-old answers of my rabbinic forebears. That is my impulse. When things get really, really difficult double down on rabbinic wisdom. The rabbis’ answers to trauma and external forces beyond our individual control, was to offer wisdom for the everyday. Their suggestions are the antidote to our fears. Here are their answers: recite blessings and affirm argument. Allow me to unpack these two bedrock principles.

Recite blessings. Like many when I awake, the first thing I do is check my phone to see what messages and Instagram posts I may have missed since falling asleep. I also read through the alerts from the Times of Israel, the New York Times and the many other news sources I follow. I read several articles before rousing myself out of bed. Sometimes I send an article with some lengthy missive to the family group chat or to my brother. And so, by the time I get out of bed I am on edge. This should come as no revelation, but social media and the iPhone are intent on creating a perpetual excited and agitated state. This is what keeps people engaged. I then tried following more cooking influencers on Instagram but that did not help and then a slew of tequila brands, but again to no avail. The alerts about tragedy kept reappearing.

A few years ago, and I admit prior to October 7th and our now debilitating worries about Israel and the Jewish people, I tried another approach to the morning. I made myself read a poem first thing. Before I touched my phone I insisted on grabbing hold of a book. I began with Mary Oliver’s, A thousand Mornings. Listen to her words:

Every day I’m still looking for God
and I’m still finding him everywhere,
in the dust, in the flowerbeds.
Certainly in the oceans, in the islands that lay in the distance
continents of ice, countries of sand
each with its own set of creatures
and God, by whatever name.

On the morning of October 7th I stopped somewhere in the middle of Billy Collins, Sailing Around the Room and it remains dog eared on page 38 by my bedside. (The book stands unfinished on Billy Collins’ poem “The History Teacher.”)

Terrorism not only takes innocent lives, but it prevents us from tending to our inner lives. Take note of the phrase so often used, the luxury of the inner life. One needs the luxury of time to tend to it. But for my teachers, and our rabbis, there was nothing luxurious about tending to the spiritual. It was essential. The rabbis did not turn their backs on politics or what was going on about them, although that was the Zionists’ critique of the rabbinic tradition. Take up arms against our enemies, they argued. Do not retreat to prayers, Zionism counseled. Isn’t it interesting that modern day Israelis are among the world’s largest consumers of poetry? Perhaps the rabbis were right after all.

Our rabbinic forebears did not of course read Mary Oliver or Billy Collins, or Yehudah Amichai or even Leah Goldberg. For our rabbis our prayers were their poems.

And they of course instructed us to recite a blessing when awakening. They understood that the world’s noise causes agitation and distraction. Although they could not have imagined social media and this triggering world we now live in, they believed that filling our lives with blessings was in our hands. We must not wait to receive blessings. Instead, we create them ourselves, by saying words. So here is my challenge to each and every one of us, including myself. Begin the morning with the words, “Modeh ani l’fanecha. I give thanks to You, every-living Sovereign, that You have restored my soul to me in mercy: How great is Your faith. She-hechezarta bi nishmati. You have restored my soul to me!”

Rabbi Meir once advised that we should strive to fill every day with the recitation of one hundred blessings and while that may seem excessive, imagine how different life might feel if it we read one hundred blessings rather than one hundred posts or alerts.

There is plenty of time to fill our day with the world’s noise and controversies and pains, but it really is in our hands to create the blessings and to say them and acknowledge them. That is Judaism’s intuition. By saying them we make them real. The words we utter can fashion a different reality than the one we inhabit. A soul filled with gratitude cannot be beaten down. We can banish fear by offering blessings. It’s not that we are going to get rid of all the terrible things happening in the word. We are not going to make peace between Russia and Ukraine, or Israelis and Palestinians by offering these prayers, but we will strengthen our souls by doing so. We will fortify ourselves so that we can go headfirst into the day’s troubles.

People might now be saying, “How quaint! While the world is on fire and burning, the rabbi wants me to say blessings.” Well, yes. That’s actually exactly what our tradition says. In fact, the last phrase of this prayer “rabbah emunatechah—how great is Your faith, O God” is taken from one of the saddest books in our Bible, Lamentations. This book portrays the prophet Jeremiah’s lament over the destruction of the first Temple. Just like 2,500 years ago, we are not ignoring the world’s traumas, but we are strengthening our resolve to face them.

Start the day with a blessing. Begin the morning with gratitude. Allow your first moments to be filled with thanks. Then read through the alerts and posts and articles. It’s not going to change the world, but it is going to change you. And that is where we must start. Banishing our own fears is where we must begin. Otherwise, we become prey to our worst impulses. Modeh ani l’fanecha. We give thanks to You O God.

Suggestion number two. And this one is going to require a lot more effort and work but if we start with the blessings then this step becomes easier. Here it is. Affirm argument. I recently remarked to a friend that everything has become politicized. It has gotten so intense that I have started worrying about the color of my ties. I can’t wear a solid red tie or blue tie. To which my friend said, “You better not wear a red tied!” That’s exactly my point. I tested my theory on a more conservative friend and guess what she said, “Oh my God. Don’t wear a blue tie.” It used to be that people welcomed the challenge rabbis’ sermons offer, but now people seem more interested in searching for affirmation. They want the rabbi to affirm their opinion. It’s as if our virtual world has become real and there are like buttons in the seat pockets before you. I appreciate affirmation just like everyone else but to be honest I much prefer argument and debate. Our society no longer appears able to sustain robust, and even heated, discussions. “Either you agree with me, or you are my enemy,” is the mantra of today’s world.

And nothing is more antithetical to the rabbinic world view than this notion. The Talmudic rabbis built an entire tradition around argument. They called it machloket l’shem shamayim, arguments for the sake of heaven. Most people think the Talmud is a law code. It is not. It is a record of discussions and debates. It preserves minority opinions alongside those of the majority. It places on the same page disagreements between rabbis who lived centuries apart and sometimes even in different cities. Two rabbis who never met each other argue with each other on the same page. The brilliance of the Talmud lies not so much in all of its opinions but in that of the editor who stitched together argument in this beautiful, and confusing, tapestry of wisdom that people like me spend a lifetime trying their best to figure out. We need a Rav Ashi, the Talmud’s editor, to stitch together the broken fragments of our society that these days appear only to know how to scream and yell at each other and label those with whom they disagree as traitor.

But if agreement was the measure of loyalty there would be no Talmud. If we labeled the views of those with which we disagree as dangerous, there would not be this 2,000-year-old rabbinic tradition. I am pretty sure there are few if any of Charlie Kirk’s views with which I agree save his embrace of argument, but murder silences debate. That is not who we are or what we are about. To the rabbis there was nothing that was out of bounds.

Take this one Talmudic example. It is the story of Elisha ben Abuya who after watching a young boy die in the midst of performing a mitzvah renounced his faith in God. (Babylonian Talmud, Kiddushin 39b) Did the rabbis write him out of the Talmud? Did they cancel his late-night show? Absolutely not. Granted some unfriended Elisha and others refused to even utter his name and called him instead Acher, meaning the other one, but they preserved his doubts and his questions and even his rejection of what they held most dear. And I love them for that simple, but profound lesson.

On this Rosh Hashanah we all need to double down on that rabbinic value. Listen to what Van Jones said who Charlie Kirk reached out to twenty-four hours before he was assassinated. He writes, “I’ve taken issue with many of Charlie’s words—sometimes strongly—but never his right to speak them. Never his right to express those views and then go back to his family. That is a sacred American value.” It’s not an argument for the sake of heaven when we call someone else dangerous. It’s not even ok to label their views as dangerous. That opens the door to violence and even murder. It grants permission to censorship. There must never be a silencing of ideas. Wasn’t that what the Right once accused the Woke Left of doing?

How do you think we survived for so many thousands of years? It was not because of a strong army. That’s a very, very new thing and it remains a rather unparalleled thing. The great lesson of our history is that we survived because we embraced arguing about any and all ideas. One cannot confront new and different circumstances if you don’t think, and argue, about different possibilities.

And these debates were built on the notion of hevruta, partnership. You argue over something sitting across the table from someone else. So here is my practical suggestion. Find a friend with whom you do not always agree. If you don’t have such a friend, then to be honest you might not know true friendship. In our siloed social media age, we argue with some disembodied other side and then retreat to our circles of agreement that offer us dopamine blasts of self-affirmation and self-congratulation. But that’s not the point. The whole point is about the sharpening of ideas. It’s about honing our responses. The only way this works is if we argue face to face with other people. I admit. It’s exhausting and can even be maddening, but I am absolutely sure that it is the only thing that has any hope of preserving community and country. We have lost the ability to argue with love.

The Jewish mystics Moshe Cordervero and Shlomo Alkabetz, the author of one of our favorite payers Lecha Dodi, had a wonderful custom. The two friends would go on regular walks through the fields of sixteenth century Safed. There was one rule and it was this. They must debate Torah. In other words that had to converse about ideas. They insisted they not fill their walks with gossip. They did not say, “Did you hear where the Rabinowitz’s are hosting their wedding?” They argued about tough questions like the one we will debate tomorrow morning, if two people are traveling in the desert and they only have enough water for one, should one person drink and thereby survive or is it better they both die? People often think that mysticism is about removing ourselves from the world, but our mystics wished to engage with each other and engage with ideas. Want to know the best answer to such difficult, if not impossible questions, then find a friend and argue.

What is the best response to antisemitism? Fight like we always have. With words. Of course we should make our institutions more secure, but the rabbis remind us that we are not arguing to convince. We are arguing for the sake of heaven. We have it all wrong. We think argument is all about winning and losing. It is not. It’s l’shem shamayim. It’s for the sake of heaven. Too often we have taught that l’shem shamayim is all about how we argue. We have to argue with love and with respect. One cannot resort to ad hominem attacks. I think it might be better to understand l’shem shamayim to be about the purpose of our arguments. It’s for heaven’s sake; it’s for God’s sake that we debate not for our own.

Find a friend and go for a walk and discuss controversial and important topics. Listen to each other. Argue and debate about things that really matter. You are probably not going to change anyone’s opinion, and the walk is probably not going to end with words like, “Wow rabbi you are so wise. I was completely wrong. And you are so right. I now agree with everything you say.” That like button does not exist in real life. Affirmation is not what argument is about. It’s not about how many likes one accumulates. Instead, here is what will happen from honest debate. You will learn and you will grow. Keep in mind it’s not about us, but about heaven. It’s all about God. We bring gratitude to God and arguments for God. That’s what is going to fortify our souls and enable us to face the difficult times ahead.

One more bit of advice. Try keeping that in mind when you host an upcoming holiday dinner. Try not to play the role of peacekeeper who lays out rules for what is allowed and not allowed to be said around the family table. Instead make sure everyone has enough time to express their views and argue their ideas. No shouting. No saying, “That’s idiotic.” Or “Are you stupid?” Why must we only wrap our arms around those with whom we agree? Forbidden family topics are antithetical to our beloved tradition.

There is a rabbinic value called shalom bayit which is usually translated as peace in the home. This may seem like it contradicts our embrace of argument. It doesn’t always sound so peaceful when everyone is arguing at the Thanksgiving table when some are saying, “Israel is committing genocide.” And others are shouting back, “Israel is defending itself against Hamas’ desire for genocide.” Or when one person says, “Immigrants are ruining this country. They are taking away jobs from you and me.” And others are shouting back, “Immigration is what built this country. I don’t care if they come here legally or not; we are a nation of immigrants.” Passions can run high. Agreement remains elusive. Shalom seems like it was not even on the menu with all those sweet potatoes. And so, the peacemaker says, “Let’s not talk about politics.” And instead says, “Did you hear where the Rabinowitz are holding their wedding? I mean L’Dor V’Dor does not even have a caterer, and Rabbi Moskowitz still thinks people should not eat lobster.”

I have come to believe that avoiding heated topics is not the shalom bayit the rabbis imagined. They wanted family harmony. They believed in relationships. They thought they could endure even the most strenuous of disagreements. Back to Elisha ben Abuya who everyone called Acher and who lost most of his friends because of his heresy. When no one else would even talk to him, Rabbi Meir the same guy who counseled us to say one hundred blessings every day, continued his friendship despite his profound disagreements with Elisha. No one was filled with more faith than Meir who even though he buried two children held on to his abiding belief in God’s providence. One Shabbat Rabbi Meir saw Elisha riding his horse. And what did Rabbi Meir do? Did he castigate his friend and teacher for his Shabbat transgression? No. Instead, he ran after him and walked alongside the horse so the two friends could continue discussing Torah. (Babylonian Talmud, Chagigah 14b)

Shalom is not about agreement. Elisha and Meir could not have disagreed more. Where there is such disagreement there is often passion and sometimes even the heartache of thinking that a friend’s views are woefully wrong and misguided. The Hebrew shalom comes from the word meaning whole. Shalom bayit means not family harmony but instead wholeness. Somehow, and as so often happens, our families and friendships stay whole despite our disagreements. We have to hold on to each other. It’s as simple as that. We have to hold on to each other while holding on to our differing commitments. We have to continue to walk together.

One of the things I love about weddings—wherever those Rabinowitz’s might end up holding their festivities—is the hora. As you are swirling around to the music and singing “Siman tov u’mazel tov” have you ever thought to yourself, “I wonder if she voted for Trump. I wonder if he voted for Biden? (Is that a blue tie?) I wonder if he is for abortion rights? I wonder if she is pro-gun rights?” Of course not—or maybe these days, I should say, “I really hope not.” In the swirl of the Jewish dance that really requires no dance moves—which is why I am so damn good at it—there is only the insistence of wrapping your arms around the person next to you. The only thing that matters is our embrace of others. The hora insists that we hold on to each other. It’s not the most peaceful moment of the party, but you have to admit the hora does live up to the shalom of wholeness.

Rebbe Nachman of Bratslav had it right about the importance of dancing and the significance of wrapping our arms around each other. His followers can still be found—and even on these days and during these turbulent times—on Jerusalem’s’ streets blasting their music and inviting people in for a dance. Nachman taught. “Kol haolam kulo gesher tzar m’od. The whole world is a narrow bridge, but the essence is not to be afraid.” The world is indeed narrowing, and our fears are growing larger, but we can combat them.

Affirm argument. Recite blessings. The fears won’t go away, but I can promise you this. “V’ha-ikar lo l’facheid klal.” The essence will no longer be our fears. We will have transformed the ikar, the essence, by our blessings and yes, even our arguments. And then our inner lives will be strong enough to face the turbulent years ahead.

Recite blessings. Affirm argument.

Every Person Is a Diamond

Soon we will gather for Rosh Hashanah services. This day is marked by introspection. We look inward so that we might better our lives. We do this surrounded by others, embraced and strengthened by our community.

A Hasidic story. I learned this tale from Rabbi Rami Shapiro.

A wealthy diamond merchant went to visit his rebbe, Rabbi Shalom Ber of Lubavitch. The merchant recently returned from Antwerp and was excited to share with the rebbe his recent purchases. He could not wait to show him some of the precious stones he purchased. The merchant was confident these stones would make his business successful, but he also hoped to get the rebbe’s blessing. The rebbe, however, appeared more interested in talking about some common laborers who the merchant found to be unlearned and boring.

“Rebbe,” the merchant finally blurted out, “I just don’t see what you see in these people. They are illiterate boors.”

The rebbe calmly replied, “Actually each and every one of them has many honorable traits.”

“Perhaps that is true. But I cannot see them,” the merchant responded.

The rebbe sat silently for a few moments and then said, “Show me your new diamonds.”

The merchant eagerly untied the velvet sack and spread the glittering diamonds on the rebbe’s desk. Lifting one stone up and holding it to the light, he said, “This one is especially fine, Rebbe.”

“I see nothing special in it. It looks like all the rest of the diamonds,” Rabbi Shalom Ber said.

“I would not expect you to see such finery, Rebbe. One must be a true connoisseur of gems to see what makes each diamond worthy of such praise.”

“Every person is also a gem, my dear friend,” the rebbe said. “And just as with your diamonds, you must be connoisseur to see what is precious in each and every person.”

The challenge of Rosh Hashanah is twofold. On the one hand we are to honestly examine our own failings. And on the other hand, we are commanded to be more forgiving of other people’s failings.

Every person is a gem. We just have to become better connoisseurs.

Make the Routine New Again

The editors of the Mishkan T’filah Shabbat prayerbook offer this Lea Goldberg poem on the page facing the tradition’s Chatzi Kaddish.

Teach my lips, a blessing, a hymn of praise,
as each morning and night
You renew Your days,
lest my day be today as the one before;
lest routine set my ways.

Lea Goldberg was one of Israel’s foremost and most beloved poets. “Lamdeini” is among her most well-known poems. It speaks of finding renewal in blessings and songs. It bemoans routinization.

Too often our tradition’s words become habitual. We recite them without thinking about their meaning. We sing them without contemplating their intention. We rush through our prayers, grabbing hold of the familiar landmarks of Barechu, Shema, Mi Chamocha and Shalom Rav. We slow down as we approach the familiar Mourner’s Kaddish.

Every Friday evening the order remains the same. This is the meaning of the Hebrew word for prayerbook, Siddur. It shares the same root as “Seder.” The words suggest it is all about the order. We begin and end our Shabbat prayers with the same formulaic words.

I have often found it curious that Goldberg’s poem lamenting routine stands opposite the Chatzi Kaddish’s words. How can we say the same words every week without making them routine? Isn’t this routine part of the prayer service’s very meaning? We would feel adrift if there was no Shema or Kaddish. We would feel lost if we did not conclude with Adon Olam. These prayers anchor our week. We enter the sanctuary searching for the familiar.

So why highlight this contrast between the Chatzi Kaddish and Goldberg’s Lamdeini? How can we realize Goldberg’s vision and make these familiar prayers new every Friday evening? How can routine offer renewal? This is the prayerbook’s dilemma. We are wedded to the tradition and its words but instructed to make them new.

The Torah affirms, “This day the Lord your God commands you.” (Deuteronomy 26). The medieval commentator, Rashi adds: “This suggests each day God’s commandments should be to you as something new (in other words, not antiquated and something of which you have become tired), as though you had received the commands that very day for the first time.”

This is our task: to make the old new again, to feel as if each recitation of every prayer is the first time we are offering it. Lest routine set our ways!

Every morning is a new day.

But only if we truly make it so.

Banish Hatred, Rewrite History

When it comes to cars, my father is extraordinarily passionate. In addition to teaching me how to change a flat tire and how to properly wash the car (“wax on, wax off”), he raised me on the mantra that I should never buy a Ford. I was taught Henry Ford was an antisemite who believed in the antisemitic canard that Jews used nefarious means to dominate the world. He republished the fabricated antisemitic The Protocols of the Elders of Zion.

To this day, I have never driven a Ford.

Among the many lessons I learned was never forget what was done to us.

It therefore came as a surprise to discover that the Torah suggests we should be more forgiving of people’s past sins and the wrongs they committed against us. “You shall not hate an Egyptian, for you were a stranger in that land.” (Deuteronomy 23) What about my father’s teachings? Forgive the Egyptians? They embittered our lives. They enslaved us!

If not for our going out from Egyptian slavery, we would not have learned what it feels like to be a stranger. The meaning of the suffering and pain we recount at our Passover seders is so that we recall how it feels to be an oppressed stranger. “Love the stranger,” the Torah repeats over and over again. Why? So that we never make anyone feel the pain we felt. So that we can help lift others out of their persecution and oppression.

But love even the Egyptians? Forgive our enslavers? Forget our tormentors?

The medieval commentator Rashi explains, “Because they were your hosts in time of need, during Joseph’s reign when the neighboring countries suffered from famine; therefore, although they sinned against you do not hate them.” Even though our years in Egypt ended with bitterness, remember the good that preceded it. Focus on the good, even if it has faded from memory and was long, long ago and even, and perhaps more importantly, if you did not personally experience this good.

Moses Maimonides, the medieval philosopher, adds, “The Torah teaches us how far we have to extend the principle of favoring those who are near to us, and of treating kindly every one with whom we have some relationship, even if they offended or wronged us; even if they are very bad, we must have some consideration for them.” (Guide of the Perplexed III:42). We are not supposed to focus on the negative. We are commanded not to dwell on the terrible things done to us but instead strive to find a measure of good in each and every person.

Is the Torah extending its love of the stranger to love our one time enemy and even oppressor? Is it possible for kindness to be so limitless? Is such unbounded kindness even achievable? At times, especially during times like these, this seems like an impossible, and unachievable, task. When we are threatened, we don’t feel much like be kind and welcoming.

Then again, if we always see ourselves as victims, if we are always intent on righting the wrongs of past injustices, our hearts will be incapable of bringing healing to others. We will be unable to see the good that is also present, albeit sometimes hidden, in the people standing before us.

Glimmers of good are too often obscured by bad. They are shrouded by the evil of prior generations. And yet good can always be discovered.

Perhaps the first step is to banish hatred from our hearts.

And in a surprising turn of events, my brother’s synagogue, Temple Shir Shalom, is now home to a Torah scroll, written in in Spain or Portugal over 500 years ago when it was forbidden to practice Judaism. The Torah was purchased and donated to the synagogue by none other than Benson Ford Jr., the great grandson of Henry Ford.

History can be rewritten by opening our hearts to good.

Addendum: Temple Shir Shalom’s Torah was recently examined by an expert scribe who determined that it is not as old as once thought or from Spain or Portugal but instead from 1860’s Hungary. In addition, my father also corrected me and said it was my grandfather z”l who advised me never to buy a Ford and that I really never mastered how to properly wash a car.

Keep the Arguments Outside the Gates

In ancient times, the court room was the city’s gates. In fact, archeologists have uncovered stone benches attached to gates of biblical cities where judges sat, heard cases, and issued rulings.

It is unfortunate that most contemporary translations render the Hebrew “shaarecha” as “your settlements” rather than the more literal “your gates.” The Torah proclaims: “You shall appoint magistrates and officials for your tribes, in all the settlements (shaarecha) that the Lord your God is giving you, and they shall govern the people with due justice.” (Deuteronomy 16)

The Bible’s intent is clear. Your gates are where justice is established. Why else would the Torah’s V’ahavta also instruct us “To write these words on the doorposts of your house and on your gates?” (Deuteronomy 6) It is because justice begins, and ends, at the threshold of a house or a city. This is why justices sat and ruled at the city’s entrances.

When people debated matters of law, or had difficulties they could not resolve, they are supposed to go to judges who are more expert in the law and more experienced in rendering decisions. People, quite literally, took their disputes to the edge of town where they were resolved.

Disagreements are kept at the borders of the city but not within. The community is kept whole, and differences, are kept at the outskirts. Only justice is allowed to enter through our gates.

It is a wonderful, and enlightening, image. Keep your arguments out there. Maintain your cohesiveness within. Repair to the gates when matters become heated, when it is too difficult for you to solve your problems without the assistance of a professional.

The prophet Amos declares: “Hate evil and love good. And establish justice in the gate.” (Amos 5)

If we establish justice at our gates, then our cities and towns, countries and communities, can indeed remain whole.

Baseball and Acknowledging Our Mistakes

Every sport has a set of somewhat peculiar rules. Soccer has yellow cards. Football a false start. Basketball has a flagrant one and even two. Hockey icing.

Unique among these sports stands baseball. No other sport keeps track of errors and makes a distinction between an earned hit and advancing to a base on an error. At each game the scorer sits in a box and makes the determination: earned or error. At the end of the game there is a tally: runs, hits and errors. In determining the standings all that matters are the number of runs. This, and this alone, determines the winner and loser of the game.

And yet there it stands: the team’s hits and the team’s errors. I know of no other sport that tracks errors and mistakes. A team can lose despite earning many hits. And a team can win despite committing several errors.

Sunday is the first day of the month of Elul. It marks the beginning of the High Holiday period, a time of introspection that culminates in Yom Kippur. It is a forty-day period that mirrors the forty days Moses spent on Mount Sinai communing with God. We are meant to turn inward, examine our deeds and look back on the past year.

We are meant to tally our errors. We are not meant to look at the standings. Our successes are immaterial. Our wins do not count. On these days it is only the error column that matters.

This may seem like a depressing exercise. But the faith of the High Holidays is that you can only get better, you can improve yourself, if you look at your faults. True introspection is about being honest about our flaws and owning our mistakes. It is about tallying our errors.

That is the faith that animates baseball. It is the belief that guides the Jewish tradition. If we acknowledge our mistakes we can improve our lives.

The hope that tempers this sometimes painful and other times awkward exercise of detailing our errors is that in those final minutes of Yom Kippur as the gates of repentance begin to close all can be forgiven.

The steps that begin in the approaching days is recounting our errors.

Remember What It Feels Like

According to rabbinic legend a fetus knows the entire Torah when in the womb. When the fetus is born an angel kisses the baby on the lip, producing the recognized indentation, and the child then forgets everything. Now this child must spend a lifetime learning Torah. It is a curious legend. The rabbis imagined that the womb not only surrounds a child with compassion but instills knowledge.

And then when we emerge into the world, we forget everything.

Once on our own, our inclination is toward forgetfulness. We must spend a lifetime combatting it.

We are commanded over and over again to remember: zakhor. This commandment serves to counter our inclination. Moses admonishes the people: “Remember the long way that the Lord your God has made you travel in the wilderness these past forty years, that God might test you by hardships to learn what was in your hearts.” (Deuteronomy 8) We must remember our history, the successes and failures, but especially the trials.

Why? Because remembering our trials can kindle compassion.

Remembering is not instinctive. Memories must be taught. One can learn from others. But remembrance is best achieved by experience. Each of us remembers our personal joys and perhaps even more our pains. The great historian Yosef Hayim Yerushalmi argues that Judaism believes forgetfulness is terrifying. This is because when we forget we have a tendency to look away from the purpose of our remembrance. We remember our pain so that we might alleviate the suffering of others.

The Torah repeatedly commands, “Love the stranger, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt.” (Deuteronomy 10). And elsewhere, “You shall not oppress the stranger, for you know the feelings of the stranger, having yourselves been strangers in the land of Egypt.” (Exodus 23)

Zakhor, remember, we are commanded. We must always remember the long way we have travelled and the many trials and pains we have endured. To forget these sufferings is to open the possibility that we might do to others what was, and is, done to us. We know the feelings of the stranger!

We are the Jewish people because we remember. Our future is dependent on hearing this command and regaining the terror of forgetting. Perhaps we will then once again reach out to others with the compassion that once surrounded us in the womb. And like that unborn nurtured child we will never again forget.

God Is Found in the Questions

People often ask me questions like “What does Judaism say about this or that?” I am always happy to offer the tradition’s answer as well as sprinklings of my interpretations. But the discussion should not end there. While the tradition may codify an answer, and while I may freely offer advice, the question and the discussion it provokes is what defines us as a people.

It is the search that provides meaning.

The Torah relates, “If you search, you will find Adonai your God, if you only seek with all your heart and soul.” (Deuteronomy 4)

The Hasidic rebbe, Menahem Mendl of Kotzk, adds, “The very act of seeking God, the longing to find God, that in itself is enough.”

Don’t let the answer define us. Allow the question and the ensuing debates—however, heated they may become—to be our defining character.

Ask questions! Discover God.

Answers may very well elude us. Have confidence and faith.

God emerges in the questions.

The Torah’s Message Is for Everyone

The Torah states: “These are the words that Moses addressed to all Israel on the other side of the Jordan.” (Deuteronomy 1)

The rabbis ask: “How did Moshe Rabbeinu, Moses our rabbi, begin to teach?” They answer their own question and say, “Moses began to explain the Torah in the world’s seventy languages.”

Even though there are hundreds of times as many languages, the question remains, didn’t the Israelites all speak the same language? Didn’t they speak Hebrew? Of course they did. So why would Moses need to explain the Torah in every language? It is because the Torah has universal import.

Too often we focus our Jewish learning on the mastery of the Hebrew language. Too often we mistake the Torah’s language for its essence. While Hebrew is of course important it does not always unlock its secrets; it cannot always unravel its mysteries. This is why Moses taught the Torah in many languages.

The lesson is clear. The most important thing about Torah is its teachings. These must be translated into every language. And these teachings must be interpreted according to everyone’s ability.

The Torah may have been given to one people, but it was never meant for one people alone. It was never meant for a privileged few.

The Torah is meant for all. It is meant for the world. It’s that each and every human being is created in the image of God is the world’s inheritance.

And that message must be proclaimed in whichever language we speak.

Gaza’s Hungry Are Now Our Responsibility

At the joint Israeli-Palestinian memorial ceremony, in 2018, the Israeli author and peace activist, David Grossman spoke about the unbearable pain of losing his son Uri in the 2006 Lebanon War. He then asked and answered a question that I have been pondering for some time. He said,

What is a home?

Home is a place whose walls—borders—are clear and accepted; whose existence is stable, solid, and relaxed; whose inhabitants know its intimate codes; whose relations with its neighbors have been settled. It projects a sense of the future.

And we Israelis, even after 70 years no matter how many words dripping with patriotic honey will be uttered in the coming days—we are not yet there. We are not yet home. Israel was established so that the Jewish people, who have nearly never felt at-home-in-the-world, would finally have a home. And now, 70 years later, strong Israel may be a fortress, but it is not yet a home. (“Israel Is a Fortress, but Not Yet a Home”)

When Israel wandered through the wilderness for forty years, they were not as we often suggest constantly on the move. They stopped, and camped, at forty-two stations along the way to the promised land of Israel. “These were the marching-stages of the Israelites who started out from the land of Egypt.” (Numbers 33)

As I watch my beloved Israel lay waste to Gaza and render it uninhabitable, as I witness Palestinians killed while clamoring for food, I am wondering if David Grossman’s intuition was tragically prescient. We are still wandering. We are not yet home! Is the modern state of Israel a mere station on our journey through history?

David Grossman concludes, “If the Palestinians don’t have a home, the Israelis won’t have a home either. The opposite is also true: if Israel will not be a home, then neither will Palestine.”

One can offer all sorts of explanations why Palestinians have not yet achieved sovereignty and why most Israelis reject a Palestinian state as a dangerous threat to their safety, nonetheless Grossman’s insight remains true. We can never arrive home if we deny others their rightful home. We will never feel at home as long as we are destroying other people’s homes.

Zionism was first and foremost about building that elusive home for ourselves. It believed our homelessness left us vulnerable to persecution. We are wanderers no more, Zionism declared. It need not, however, proclaim that this ancient land is only our home. Today’s Israel appears more focused on declaring that this place only provides enough room for us—and no one else. Despite its founding principles, the State of Israel appears to be saying this land can only be the Jewish people’s home. It focuses on buttressing the fortress’s walls and turning a blind eye to what happens outside the locked gates.

Gazans are starving!

All the cries about our security and the dismissing of every critic as an antisemite or a self-hating Jew or alternatively blaming everything on Hamas or denying that multitudes are starving, will never justify that people (infants!) are dying of hunger. Hamas started this war, but Israel now controls Gaza, and its starving people are now Israel’s responsibility. Their deaths are a stain on our collective Jewish soul. Feeding their hungry is now our duty. Has October 7th so hardened our hearts that we have no concern for other human beings? Gaza has become a humanitarian crisis that demands our compassion. (Read David Horowitz, “How Israel Made Itself Responsible for Gaza and All the Death and Destruction There”)

I do not know how Israelis and Palestinians can both feel at home in this same, shared—and shattered—land, but I remain convinced that this is our only hope. Two states for two peoples is the only path to providing a shred of light in this darkness. And while such a Palestinian home remains a far-off possibility, glimmers of Palestinian self-determination might begin to lead us away from today’s destruction and despair.

The State of Israel once imagined itself to be guided by the prophets of Israel when in 1948 David ben Gurion declared: “The state will be based on freedom, justice and peace as envisaged by the prophets of Israel.” Let their words serve as a reminder now.

The prophet Isaiah thunders, “Offer your compassion to the hungry, and satisfy the famished creature—then shall your light shine in darkness, and your gloom shall be like noonday.” (Isaiah 58)

We must lead with compassion rather than callousness.

Only then will this darkness begin to fade.

Immigration Blues, Part II

We wander the wilderness.

This is the defining feature of the Book of Numbers, whose Hebrew name Bamidbar means “in the wilderness.” We look toward the promise, and the promised land of Israel, but reaching this home often eludes us.

I had planned on venturing to Israel on my annual pilgrimage of study and learning at Jerusalem’s Shalom Hartman Institute, but Israel’s bombing of Iran’s nuclear facilities and Iran’s missile attacks on Israel’s cities caused Delta to cancel all their summer flights. It was impossible, and some even thought, unwise, to find alternative flights to Israel and so we instead made a trip to visit our son Ari, who is now fashioning a home for himself in Antwerp, Belgium.

The city is known for its bustling port, as well as its amazing chocolate, beer and fries. The port’s significance dates to the twelfth century and helped to make Antwerp an important center of trade. This is why one hundred years ago, it served as the departing city for many immigrants making their way from Europe to America. Some two million people traveled through this city as they wandered toward a new home.

In fact, it is from here that my grandfather boarded a ship to New York. A mere two miles from Ari’s apartment Papa Bill, along with his mother and two siblings, waited in the Red Star Line’s boarding area. There they were examined to make sure they did not have any ailments. If these third-class passengers were turned away by American authorities, they would be sent back to Europe at the shipping company’s expense.

Walking through the Red Star Line Museum, I tried to imagine my then two-year-old grandfather clinging to his mother in the crowded warehouse. It is impossible to imagine the anxiety she must have felt trying to keep her children nearby and hoping everything would work out as she and her husband planned. Would the American authorities allow them into the country after such a long journey? What would she do if she could not be reunited with her husband and other boys in New York? There was no home behind her.

The only promise was ahead of her.

And now it appears that this transit point is a waystation no more. Antwerp is becoming my son’s home.

Perhaps wandering is what has always defined our people. Home is not some place on a map. It is instead what we build for ourselves. (By the way, growing up in St Louis, I never imagined Long Island would become my home or that I would become a New Yorker!)

Wandering is not aimless.

It is not the destination that writes meaning. It is instead the movement from one place to another that define us.

History, and Torah, are written by wandering forward.

The promise always remains ahead of us—wherever that might lead.

Will the World Bless Israel?

After Israel’s resounding defeat of the Amorites the young nation’s surrounding neighbors feared them. The Torah recounts, “Moab was alarmed because that people were so numerous. Moab dreaded the Israelites.” (Numbers 22) And so Balak, the Moabite king, calls his trusted prophet Balaam and insists he curse the Israelites.

Today’s Israel has likewise routed its enemies. Its military might is unrivaled. It has vanquished (although perhaps only temporarily) the strategic threats from Iran and its proxies of Hezbollah, Hamas and despite the sporadic rockets from Yemen, the Houthis. Even though its hostages remain in Gaza’s tunnels Hamas no longer represents a military threat to Israel’s citizens.

And yet Israel’s surrounding nations refuse to accept it. They resist acknowledging Israel’s right to exist. The Zionist dream of becoming a nation like all other nations remains elusive. Israel’s Declaration of Independence envisions that the state will “confer upon the Jewish people the status of a fully privileged member of the comity of nations.”

Israel is roundly criticized on the world stage. It is denied equal standing among the family of nations. Its wrongs are called to witness against its founding. Its rights are belittled and begrudged. In the past two years especially, we have witnessed Israel treated as a pariah state.

Balaam set out to curse the Israelites. In the course of his journey miracles change his heart and his curses turn into blessings. He looks out at the Israelites, and his fear is transformed. He instead offers blessings. “As Balaam looked up and saw Israel encamped tribe by tribe, the spirit of God came upon him. He said, ‘How fair are your tents, O Jacob, Your dwellings, O Israel!’” (Numbers 24)

And it is these words that begin our morning prayer services. “Mah tovu ohaalecha, Yaakov, mishk’notecha. Yisrael!” We sing the words of a Moabite prophet. Every morning, we chant the words of our ancient enemy!

These days I am wondering if these words are not our most heartfelt prayer. We yearn to gain the blessings and praise of our neighbors. The Zionist dream was to be a nation like all other nations. Our longing remains for the Jewish people to no longer be treated as an outcast and to be welcomed into the family of nations.

This prayer continues to elude us.

We long to hear the world shout, “Mah tovu!

For now, the situation will remain what it has always been. These words begin our days. Our ancient prayer will remain unfulfilled.

Immigration Blues

Once we had a country and we thought it fair. Look in the atlas and you'll find it there. We cannot go there now, my dear, we cannot go there now. W H Auden, “Refugee Blues” 1939

On this July 4th I am thinking about my grandparents.

Here is my Papa Bill’s story. He came to this country in 1906 at the age of two. He was accompanied on this journey by his mother Leah and older sister Hannah, age six, and brother Grisha, age four. They traveled by train from Katerinoslav, a city in Ukraine, to the port of Antwerp. There they boarded a ship for the ten-day trip to New York.

I am imagining my grandfather as a toddler. He clutched his mother’s hand for the two-week journey. She chased after him when he started crawling away from her on the train. She held him in her arms when he became seasick. She comforted him when he cried from hunger. I imagine his mother’s fear. Would they be allowed to enter the United States? At the time, our country only allowed able bodied men, and their families, entry, and turned away those showing any signs of illness.

Leah wondered. Would she be turned away before being reunited with her husband, Moses? It remained a possibility. Immigration officials were known to be arbitrary, and sometimes even cruel. She had last seen Moses three years prior when he returned home to see the family and share his plans for their future in America. (If not for that return visit, my grandfather would not have been born and everything I know would not exist.)

Leah longed to see her older boys, Abraham and Saul, who had made the trek by themselves. A few years before her own journey, she had put her thirteen-year-old and fifteen-year-old on a train so they could help Moses earn enough money for the rest of the family to make it to America. They spoke no English. They wore their names in a tag around their necks. They vomited repeatedly in the confines of steerage. I wonder. Did they comfort each other? Did they squabble as brothers so often do? Were they excited? Were they at times terrified?

Moses met them after they were processed in Ellis Island. (Can a human being ever be processed?) It was a full month later when my great grandmother Leah finally received the letter telling her that her boys had made it safely to their new home.

Imagine sending your children on such a journey. Imagine not being able to receive a text message from them after they landed safely in whichever country they are going to gallivant around on their semester abroad. We do not know the sufferings of prior generations. We forget the feelings of the stranger.

I am certain that immigrants only take the extraordinary risks that they take because they believe their current home offers no hope for the future. They do not board a rickety boat in choppy seas or traverse a raging stream or sneak underneath a border fence or put their children on a train by themselves unless they believe that such risks offer the only possible hope. My great grandparents believed in the promise of America. They knew it offered the only hope for their children. Their choice ensured that their children could become my beloved grandparents.

I remain forever grateful for their courage. I am forever indebted for their conviction.

America offered the promise that here you can be free from persecution and that your success would be measured, not by your religion, but by how hard you worked.

They believed in this promise so wholeheartedly that my grandmother, Nana Lee, came to this country without her own grandmother. Her grandmother had an eye infection and so was not allowed to enter the United States. A choice was made. Better that future generations would have the opportunity to build a better life in America. Sarah, for whom I am named, chose a future for Lee and said goodbye to her mother. She never saw her again. Years later, she was informed of her mother’s death by telegram.

After reading the message, she began sitting shiva. That is the custom. You begin your mourning when you learn of the death. Imagine that. Actually, we cannot imagine such hardships. Three generations later, we have forgotten our own stories. We have lost touch with our own history.

You do not make such choices unless you believe you have no other choice.

I am the grandchild of the child who was carried here and the child who never saw her own grandmother ever again.

On Tuesday, I attended an interfaith vigil on mass deportations. I attended this service to honor my grandparents’ memories. There we heard via Zoom from two brothers Jose and Josue Trejo Lopez. Although they are now nineteen and twenty years old and have lived here for ten years, they were recently deported to their birth country of El Salvador. They spoke in perfect, unaccented English and described in harrowing detail the ordeals of their deportation. They were shackled, denied food and water, and regular bathroom breaks during their weeks in detention.

I thought of my grandfather’s brothers. I became teary eyed as I imagined how pained my grandparents would become and how they would invariably shout, “Shanda!” when hearing of such American cruelty. We walked from the church to the street corner where many immigrants are detained by ICE agents.

As I walked, I thought of my tradition’s demands. The Torah repeats over and over again: “There shall be one law for the citizen and for the stranger who dwells among you.” (Exodus 12). We forget the feelings of the stranger. We look away from the demands of our heritage.

The only thing that America ever provided my grandparents was a promise. And they fell in love with that American dream.

The most important thing my grandparents ever gave me was providing me with that same promise and dream.

On this July 4th I pledge to continue fighting for that promise and dream. I will forever honor their memories. I will strive to live up to my tradition's demands.

Nations Are Built on Loving Debate

Korah and his followers gather against Moses shouting, “You have gone too far! For all the community are holy, all of them, and the Lord is in their midst. Why then do you raise yourselves above the Lord’s congregation?” (Numbers 16)

One can understand their complaints. It is easy to imagine what people might have been saying about Moses. “Can you believe this guy? He keeps telling us he talks with God and that everything is going to turn out ok. He is so full of himself. The land is so beautiful, he keeps saying. But when are we going to arrive? How much longer are we going to wander around this barren wilderness? Day after day we eat this manna. Day after day we keep walking and walking. And then we walk some more. Every day is the same.”

One can be sympathetic to their grumblings. On the surface the criticisms appear legitimate. Judaism believes everyone can speak with God. Our religion requires no intermediary. Moses is no holier than any other human being. Yet Korah and his followers are severely punished. Why?

The Midrash suggests an answer. It imagines Korah asking Moses these questions: “Does a tallit made completely of blue still require blue fringes? Does a room full of Torah scrolls still require a mezuzah?” In the rabbinic imagination Korah’s questions are brimming with disdain. His words suggest that he mockingly questions the entire system. Because Korah is so disrespectful he is punished.

We often do the same. We highlight inconsistencies in our religious systems. We point out cracks in our political systems. We seek not to correct but instead to mock. It is of course far easier to make fun of something rather than affirm. It is far simpler to make ad hominem attacks rather than criticizing with love and in the hope to improve.

We live in an age when too many have become Korah. We seek to amuse. We mock those with whom we disagree. We even call those with whom we disagree traitors. Our culture measures an argument’s winner not by the merit of the ideas offered but by the reactions of participants. If someone is made to cry or stammer then they have lost the argument, even better if they are made to do so on TV.

We no longer debate ideas. Instead, we attack others.

We have become Korah. And for this we should ask forgiveness and mend our ways. If we are ever going to make it to our promised land and improve our society, we must stop attacking each other. We must instead debate and argue about ideas that have the potential to change our world.

What Korah failed to understand we as well no longer grasp. We are all in this together. And we are all in the wilderness. We had better master debating the ideas that matter without seeking to undermine the entire system. We had better figure out a way to argue with each other while not shouting at each other words of hate.

Of those who left Egypt only two made it to the Promised Land.

I imagine Joshua and Caleb missed their brethren. I also imagine that they understood why they stood alone.

A nation cannot be built in the wilderness. A nation can only be sustained—first by love and then by debate.

It’s Not about Bunkers and Bombs

The Torah begins, “Send men to scout the land of Canaan.” (Numbers 13) Moses instructed the spies to determine if the enemy was strong or weak, few or many. Do they live out in the open or in fortified towns?

According to press reports, prior to Israel’s attack on Iran’s nuclear facilities, the Mossad spy agency embedded agents in Iran. These covert operatives helped to take out Iran’s air defenses so that the Israeli air force could take command of the skies and soon declare air superiority.

When it comes to Israel, and Israel’s actions, everything seems to take on biblical proportions. Our worries are likewise magnified. I am concerned for family and friends who are in harm’s way. They have experienced many sleepless nights. When Iran launches its ballistic missiles, they have to run to bomb shelters. My fears have become apocalyptic. What might happen if the United States enters the war?

Although I have confidence in Israel’s military planners (they have been strategizing about these attacks against Iran’s nuclear facilities for twenty years), I worry about the consequences. No military action is decisive. Terms like surgical strikes are misnomers. Collateral damage means innocent civilians are killed. Wars bring unintended consequences. They don’t solve problems with the precision of a surgeon’s knife.

This is not to suggest that Israel should not have attacked. Israel’s leaders have a moral duty to protect its citizens from Iran’s genocidal designs. I have always said that when antisemites rise up and say they want to kill you we must take them at their word. And when antisemites try to build nuclear weapons that can realize these designs Zionism dictates, we must take action.

Israel was founded to safeguard Jewish lives. How can it then allow Iran’s leaders to endanger these lives? It cannot. It must not.

The State of Israel was founded soon after the world learned of the Holocaust. It took to heart important lessons from that cataclysm. Never again will Jewish lives be extinguished without a fight. Its soldiers found meaning in the example of Masada’s Zealots who sacrificed their own lives rather than be taken prisoner by the Roman legion. It seized on the heroes of the Warsaw Ghetto uprising as exemplars.

We likewise laud the soldiers who fought against the Nazi regime. We speak of their heroism on D-Day’s beaches and in the forests of Belgium. We forget that our defeat of Nazism involved far more than military gallantry. The great success, and victory of World War II, can better be found in the mundane intricacies of the Marshall Plan. That’s how we truly defeated Nazism. Hateful, and yes even murderous, ideologies can never be defeated by military means alone.

It’s never just about bunkers and bombs.

To think that it will all be cured by bigger bombs and larger planes is fallacy.

Tell the Eyes What to See

When the Israelites wandered through the wilderness, God provided them with manna. The tradition explains manna was this magic-like food substance that not only provided sustenance but tasted like whatever the Israelites wanted it to taste like. The Torah states, “Now the manna was like coriander seed, and its appearance was like bdellium.” (Numbers 11)

Coriander has an earthy, slightly sweet flavor comparable to cilantro. Its leaves are often used in Middle Eastern dishes. And bdellium is a semi-transparent tree resin that has the fragrance of myrrh. Perhaps its semi-transparent appearance allowed it to take on any taste.

The Hebrew suggests a hidden meaning. The word for “appearance” is “k’ayin.” It comes from the word “eye.”

The Hasidic rebbe, Shlomo Lutzker, expands on the meaning of this word. He teaches about how God created the world with words and says, “God’s word is the animating force that gives everything life, and God’s word is akin to the appearance, taste, smell, and the pleasure within the world. The brilliance of this force is referred to as the ‘eye’ of each thing.”

In other words, the “eye” implies the essence of the physical world. The rabbi concludes, “The divine life force sparkles and glimmers through the world, just as the vitality of your intellect twinkles through your eyes.” Every living thing, everything we see, touch and smell offers glimpses of the divine. The eye must be trained to see these glimmers.

Too often we do not see the positive and focus on the negative. This is especially true when it comes to food. We complain about the cost of dinner. We protest the foods served. We say, What! Hamburgers again! I want sushi!” Imagine if said instead, “How beautiful and tasty is the food I am eating.”

That is the lesson of manna. Its secret ingredient was imagination. It was not about whether the chef seasoned the dish properly or arranged it on the plate for the perfect Instagram post. Manna tasted like we wanted it to taste. It was transparent. Each and every Israelite created their own image of it. Our food was transformed by our mind.

Art Green, a leader in the Jewish Renewal movement, adds, “The manna shows us that the physical world indeed twinkles with divine brilliance, hinting at an all-inclusive illumination just beneath the surface. The deeper truth is that the sights, sounds, and tastes of this world are a colorful representation of divine light refracted through the prism of the physical realm.”

The physical world sparkles with the divine. Even the everyday activity of eating provides an opportunity to glimpse the divine.

It is all about how our eyes choose to see things.

I Will Stand as One

Another week, another attack.

We pray for the speedy recovery of those injured in the Boulder firebombing attack. According to FBI agents the attacker wanted to kill all Zionists and shouted, “Free Palestine” at the marchers.

Although there were stirrings of Zionist thought throughout Jewish history, the political movement of modern Zionism is traced to Theodore Herzl. And Herzl’s passion for this cause began when he stood in a Paris square on January 5, 1895, and came face to face with antisemitism at the public degradation of Alfred Dreyfus.

Captain Dreyfus was a French military officer who was accused of spying for Germany. It was later proven that the charges were fabricated, and Dreyfus was innocent. Nonetheless a military court found him guilty and sentenced him to exile and life imprisonment on the Devil’s Island penal colony in French Guiana.

On that cold winter day, Alfred Dreyfus was marched by armed guards toward a military square. Along the way, crowds shouted at him, cursing and yelling “traitor” and “death to the Jew.” He stood still as he listened to the condemnation from a military officer who said, “Dreyfus, you are unworthy to carry arms. In the name of the people of France, we degrade you.” The officer then took Dreyfus’ sword, broke it in pieces, and removed the buttons and insignia from his uniform.

For a moment Dreyfus hesitated. Then he shouted, “Vive la France! You have degraded an innocent man! I swear that I am innocent!”

Theodor Herzl was shaken by what he witnessed on that January day. He determined that a Jewish state granting Jews protection and passports, finally providing them equal status among the family of nations was the only the answer to such antisemitism. He did not care where that state might be or even what language might be spoken there. For Herzl we just needed a state of our own to protect us from such venomous, and murderous, hate.

When a man thinks that attacking Jews marching seven thousand miles away from the ravages of Israel’s continued war with Hamas can effectuate changes to what is happening in Israel-Palestine, then that is antisemitism. When a shooter thinks that murdering two young people who were attending a conference sponsored by the American Jewish Committee, then that is antisemitism.

It is no different than those crowds shouting at Captain Dreyfus. He was suspect in their eyes because they believed a Jew could not be fully French. He harbors dual loyalties, they believed. Sarah and Yaron were viewed as guilty because of the company they kept. The marchers were targeted because they identify with Israel and Israelis.

There are plenty of criticisms for how Israel is currently conducting the war. The marchers in Boulder believe that the lives of the hostages must take priority and that only a cease fire will bring the remaining, living hostages home. They are in effect marching against Prime Minister Netanyahu and his government’s priorities and its actions. Sarah and Yaron were attending a conference about how to bring aid to Gaza’s innocent. Yet again our attackers and haters cannot make such distinctions.

All Jews are guilty. All Zionists have blood on their hands. And so, they can be shot, burned and their swords broken.

Jews respond I am not the kind of Jew who haters hate. Some renounce Zionism. Others distance themselves from Jews who do not share their commitments. But such internal distinctions or philosophical debates are lost on antisemites. It’s the Jew who antisemites hate not the imagined “those other Jews” or “not my kind of Jew.”

I am going to continue my arguments with my people and my protests for a more just world where every people can have a state they call home. I am going to march for the end of this war so that the hostages might return to their homes and that Gaza’s innocent might rebuild their lives. I continue to pray, may Israelis and Palestinians soon know peace! May Gaza’s children no longer feel hunger!

In the face of yet another attack, here is what I resolve. As long as the haters see us as one, I will stand as one.